Have you ever had one of those totally inexplicable imaginary visions which appear to make a mockery of everything around you?
A kind of daydream brought on by start reality but without any kind of sense or reason other than the ludicrous state people allow themselves to get into?
Well I did recently, while walking through Grantham Market Place on a sunny Saturday after watching a TV documentary on the current epidemic of self-harming obesity.
Imagining special summer family events we hope will grace our apology for a new and vibrantly updated though inefficient car park, I was transported momentarily into my own version of ‘Wonderland’.
There in front of what used to be Woolworths was the fake beach or sandpit we’ve witnessed before on such occasions, although this one seemed to fill the whole area and displayed what I believed to be the most obscene spectacle imaginable.
Elephant seals everywhere! The surreal effects of so many obese human monstrosities had brought on a waking nightmare!
Not that I’ve got anything against elephant seals or indeed, fat people. It might even have been a case of, there, but for the grace of God and a hastily drummed up diet, go I.
How could otherwise perfectly ordinary people – en masse in Grantham’s case – have gluttonised themselves into such a corpulent state?
Something must be done. Our greedy government would claim that austerity helps, but that’s a cheap shot they themselves might use, so forget it.
But for once I applaud them for trying with their current fight the flab campaign.
Tell you what! Unlike those avaricious MPs who accept their own outrageous salary increases despite the poverty of others, they could help even more by giving us a lead with communal fasting ... indefinitely!